Thursday, January 3, 2013

Face the Facts. Vs. Taking Responsibility


On one hand, I say “Face the facts” and listen to the man. And on the other hand, I have to do a full psychoanalysis of the relationship and whose really at fault for things going wrong: it is clearly me. This is not a defenseless, naive girl who is making excuses for the man: it was me testing and challenging our relationship over and over. Again, this was not a relationship that ended because of his mistakes, but because of my own.  The incident with the Moroccan is a mystery, but all his reasons involved my behavior, which were things that were 100 percent true. 
 I am aware of my mistakes, my words, and actions.  When I had a problem, I would always call him and relied on him to “fix” everything for me.  What kind of relationship is this? The beginning is suppose to be bliss not full of problems constantly.

After breaking up, we were talking sporadically throughout the week.  At first, I asked if his decision was final because I still thought maybe he was just angry when he made the decision.  I tried to explain to him that I appreciated everything he did for me and I want to work on our relationship not just give up 100 percent.  He said his famous statement, “I already take my decision.” After this, he hung up the phone on me, I decided that I needed to just let go and move on at this point.

Although, he was my friend to begin with and I was not ready to just let that go 100 percent.  When we did speak a couple times, I could hear in his voice that he still cared for me, but he was clearly repressing his feelings or guilty for his own action-Who knows?

No comments:

Post a Comment