Thursday, January 31, 2013

How are you today?

In Morocco, I give them a 95 percent for the effort they put into their initial engagement with others.  It is beautiful to see how genuine they are in their initial engagement and interaction, which I believe is why people love their visits to Morocco-they feel "welcome with open arms." They have pretty much mastered the art of engagement- thumbs up to them. 

In the US, people may not even ask how you are doing and we might even have the thought "do I have to ask how they are doing or do I have to say hello." If we are in a hurry, we do not like sitting and spending time with the "hellos" and "how is the family." We just want to say hello and keep moving and this is not a good way to be.  For example, in the beginning of my stay in Morocco, I would just get in the taxis and sometimes say hello.  Now, I always say "Salam Alikoum" to everyone when I enter into the cab.  Again, we adapt to people and our environment around us.  People are kind, sweet, and welcoming, and we should be the same way in return.

Upon observing the interaction phase, I spend time listening to what they say, observing facial expressions, but a significant observation is the time investment.  The time investment into the engagement is impressive considering the circumstances i.e. no matter how busy people will always make time to ensure the other person is well. Sometimes it can be five minutes or more of back and forth, "Lebes, Sava, Bikhir, Hamdullah." These are all the engagement and words of peace, wishing each other well, and checking to make sure one another are fine. Instead of just asking once, "How are you?" they have to confirm that you are okay a few times over and over.  They genuinely care about how you are doing and you can feel it in their voice and facial expression. It is a real interaction between human beings: the taxi driver and the passenger, the waiter and the customer, the police man and the pedestrian, the beggar and the driver in the car, etc. This is one of the only things I have mastered-these words of engagement followed by the hand over the heart...



When people make an effort with you it makes you want to make an extra effort with them..the beauty of interpersonal interaction.....PRIS

 

Bon Soir Casablanca



 



 
 

Monday, January 28, 2013

Keeps Me Going


Just a little more love, just a little more peace is all It takes to live a dream- walking hand and hand got to understand that one day too we’ll live in harmony…..

 

Two Men Lost At Sunset

 

Kind, passionate, alive, beautiful hearts, sophisticated, intelligent,elegant, perfect dose of mystery, sex appeal, great dancers, great sense of humor, beautiful smile....

All good things must come to an end.....


Your Giving me Such Sweet Nothing

And Calvin Harris does it again with another song with great lyrics! Are you writing these songs for me Calvin Harris or is that just God introducing your music to me at just the right time....You are awesome Calvin Harris=)

 

Consciousness and Clothing

Being in Muslim countries for a year now, I have definitely adapted to the way of dressing.  In Casablanca, I have become a bit more casual wearing jeans sometimes and I wear a leather jacket, which is short, but I wear a sweater underneath, which will cover my behind and part of my legs.  Even when I wear this leather jacket, I feel self-conscious like I should be wearing a longer jacket. When it comes to my chest, arms, and legs-they are always covered. It is amazing how an environment can change your consciousness.

When I get dressed, I am conscious of what I am wearing out on the streets.  It is not about caring about what people think, but it is about presenting yourself in a nice manner.  Again, there are those traditionally dressed and those who dress in a complete Westernized fashion. When I do leave the house and something feels too tight I will go back upstairs and change. The pants I have are loose fitting on me and if I wear leggings I will wear a knee length mini dress. There were a couple times I remember I just wore leggings and a top and I felt naked. I kept pulling my top down and put my jacket around my waist.  I told myself I would never do it again and that stayed in my conscious-dress appropriate and stay conservative.   

In the states, you just follow trend and you are not always conscious of you are wearing. I must say I cared about my appearance a lot of the time and did not enjoy wearing short, revealing outfits, but I did show off my legs frequently wearing short shorts in the summer(who wears long, board shorts in the US). Now it almost feels like it would be a crime to expose my legs outside of the home. I do not think I could actually do it because I know the attention will attract and I  would just feel guilty. This is fascinating how much an environment can influence your choices and behavior.

It is significant to note that I am living in Morocco not Saudi Arabia.  There are girls that dress like Westernized girls and if you go out at night it seems like the theme is “the tighter, the outfit” the better.  But fashion wise, these girls are lost and confused and most need some serious wardrobe changes.  For me, tighter has never, ever meant better and if given a preference I love long, elegant gowns not short, tight dresses where you can not move. Newsflash: Tighter is not better and sends the wrong message to public especially to men.    
Priscilla will keep to her Muslim ways of dressing, but I am not Muslim. I am a proud Christian girl in my heart.....

Karma: Ce La Vie

When it comes to Karma, I believe in the saying "What goes Around Comes Around."
When it comes to my meetings, I am not following through 100 percent as I should be. I guess you can say I am a bit Moroccan by not coming through 100 percent as committed. This does not happen with my students and actually I change my schedule too much for them, which may result in missing a meeting or something planned.  The missed encounters do happen with people I respect and like as people and this is unfortunate, but it happens and I am 100 percent aware of my good actions and bad ones.  It happens and I feel disappointed about it.   

For example, if a client cancels on me, I do not feel surprised rather I think it is just karma.  It is naturally going to happen sometimes-people canceling, but when you are not 100 percent committing perhaps the universe will not let 100 percent committ to you.  When you are doing your best and showing up for everything and people cancel-then this is not Karma, it is just cancellation.  At the end of the day, the outcome all measures up to our standards and outcomes.  We are not meeting our potential then others will not be meeting our potential and needs as wants.  We can just try to be the best we can be(literally just try) and if you aren't the best you can be than so be it-Accept and Move Forward. 
                                                   Karma and The UniverSe

The Ultimate Challenge

Working in Morocco is not all sunshine and rainbows rather it presents "The Ultimate Challenge"
Moroccans are friendly, warm, with good intentions, but being clear and direct is a weakness for Moroccans. They prefer to just say "Maybe", "I don't know", or avoiding communication all together. It feels like the word "No" is uncommon and misplaced in their vocabulary.
 
With this said, starting a business in a city where people are indirect and unclear at times may result in potential problems.  When you receive five different answers for one question, this is a challenge. When you do not speak the language, this is a challenge(a challenge of your own fault if you are not learning the language).  When you are being paid by companies and they do not want to pay you on time, this is a challenge.        When your services are worth a certain amount and people try to negociate with you, this is a challenge.  For example, having a client drive a brand new Mercedes, but they are trying to negociate for a 100DH discount?

Having to wait for everything is challenging, but part of the culture.  I am finally getting my business cards after being told they would be finished in three days and then having to figure out ten different ways to nicely ask for them.
A system within a system- this is exactly what I mean. Finding a way to get things accomplished that is outside of their way of functioning.  Efficiency is something lacking from the vocabulary so to acheive it you need to create your navigation for the "secret system."

This may sound confusing, but people who live abroad and not in the US(where all resources and opportunities are available to them pretty much all the time) can understand how to navigate through this system.  It involves asking questions five or six times, following up more than usual, writing things down that people say, giving deadlines/contracts, and setting up clear boundaries. It is a quite the challenge, but it can also be quite fun at times.

A person who signs themselves up for the challenge can not complain when they are doing it-they just need to work through it.... 
 

Beep, Beep, Beeeep

That is the exact sound of the horns honking away in Casablanca. They beep once, twice, and then the third time lasting for about two minutes straight. One of my co-workers couldn't have said it better "A whole bunch of beeping for a whole lot of nothing."  My theory is that there is more created traffic than actual traffic.  These people seriously do not know how to drive. It seems like each time I am on the Zerktouni it gets worse or it just depends on my articulation based on how much patience I have been granted for the day. 

The driving goes is something like this.....

 
Does this look organized to you? In places like India, Istanbul, New York, and LA-there is real traffic. India especially is a hott mess because it has a billion people living there and you have bikes, donkeys, fruit vendors, rickshas, vespas, and more on the road.  In Casablanca,  there are not that many people here and it is manageable if people would learn some basic rules of the road.  People do not follow any rules of the road and they just drift from lane to lane as if they were floating on a cloud. 
 
 
 
 
As you can see from this presented picture above, you have all cars driving outside of their designated lane. Per my friend Matan, the driving situation is "out of control." There are so many times I am sitting in a taxi where I look in front and I look behind and there is no traffic, but the traffic is created just between 5 cars on the road. They are braking excessively, drifting, not using turn signals, and beeping like there is no tomorrow.  Stop beeping the horn when you are all responsible for the poor driving situation.
 

65 Percent?!

Walking through my neighborhood back from my meeting, I stumbled upon the Pantene ProV truck.  It is quite rare to see advertising trucks in Casablanca-at least I have never seen one.

The Moroccan girl helps me fill out the sheet and she is laughing because her English is pretty much non-existent, but she tries(I always appreciate those who try because I try).

After I fill it out, she takes out a beige colored device that looks like a remote control and puts it towards my head. Being funny and dramatic, I jump away from her in fear of what she was about to do. I look inside the truck and see a girl having a similar procedure done with this device.

After her, I  jump up on the seat like a little 10 year old. I am excited to see what this remote actually does.  She takes a few strands of my hair 1,2,3,4 and “Beep, beep, beep-reading 67 percent.” Her face looks shocked and a bit sad for me. The photographer is standing in front of me and two other Pantene Pro V girls who are shaking their head.

I am sitting there a bit confused wondering what happened. The photographer says, “Not good, not good.”  I am officially feeling bad as I know that what this reading of 67 percent is not good.  The girl takes out another interactive touch screen device and I scroll through where it asks some questions about my hair type.  I keep scrolling through to the end where it says, “67 percent damage.”

My mouth is wide open and I sit in disbelief. I knew that my hair had become bad the past couple years, but 67 percent damage. I am 28 years old. Will I have any hair even left when I turn 35 or 40?

To be dramatic and funny, I ask the Pantene Pro V girl to test her own hair. “Beep, beep, beep-3 percent.” She sits and pets her hair and smiles with her cute blue braces.  We then test another Pantene Pro V girl’s hair- “Beep, beep, Beep 6 percent.” Okay so these girls have Virgin hair-they have never once colored their hair.  I have been coloring my hair since 16 and I am not 28 so that makes 12 years of color about 5 percent damage per year to equal 68 percent. 

At this point, I am sitting in speaking in my Englija (English and Darija) and making them laugh hysterically with my disbelief that it is really 68 percent and my worrying thoughts that maybe I will have no hair by age 35. 

This is clearly a sign to stop coloring my hair, but I love being brunette and blonde. I thought about growing out my natural hair color, but in the meantime I would have to walk around with unbelievable roots. My color was five months ago and I hardly ever wait that long. It actually takes longer than one year to grow out my hair because I tried to do it while traveling and it was nowhere close after eight months. 

From that Pantene Pro V truck, I bought some oil replacement, but they did not give me any reassurance that this would improve my damage.  They made me feel a bit like a hopeless cause, but perhaps that is because they really could not communicate with me because they did not speak English. Let’s hope I can improve that 68 percent!

Facts About Operation Smile Morocco

Quick Facts
  • Operation Smile Morocco is part of a global alliance of Operation Smile Foundations and Resource Chapters dedicated to providing free treatment to children and adults suffering from cleft lips, cleft palates and other facial deformities.

  • Operation Smile Morocco is honored to operate under the Honorific Presidency of Her Royal Highness Princess Lalla Mariam, Honorary Chairperson.

  • In Morocco, approximately 1 in every 800 babies is born with a facial deformity.

  • Children with facial deformities who do not receive reconstructive surgery often have difficulty breathing, drinking, eating and speaking. As a result, many suffer from malnutrition, medical and psychological problems.

  • In as little as 45 minutes, one cleft lip surgery can change a child's life forever.

  • It costs as little as 3200 MAD to repair a child’s cleft lip.

  • Operation Smile Morocco is a registered N.G.O.

  • Operation Smile Morocco has treated more than 6800 children and trained more than 2000 healtcare professionals in AHA programs since 1999

  • There are more than 300 Operation Smile Morocco Volunteers

  • Operation Smile Morocco sends physicians to the annual Operation Smile Physicians' Training Program (PTP) - held at Operation Smile’s headquarters in Norfolk, Virginia, USA. PTP brings doctors from around the world together for training in their respective specialties.

From the website:
http://morocco.operationsmile.org/index.phtml

Priscilla Visits Operation Smile


Last week, I met with one of the Directors for Operation Smile at the Casablanca location.  It was great to see the magic that was happening all in one place- surgeries happening hour by hour and kids lives changing forever-amazing.
 After visiting the site and discussing my goals and interest in involvement, I signed on to become a Fundraiser for “Operation Smile" and also volunteer my time for the Missions, which are completed a few times per year.  When we put both our heads together, we came up with the idea of incorporating my teaching with fundraising.  Starting to work with various companies and private clients teaching “Business English” in Morocco, it would be effective to spread awareness about a great cause while teaching lessons. If I incorporate “Operation Smile” into some of my lessons this would benefit a greater cause and this makes me feel good.

It came straight from the source that this would be the best way I could help the organization and I  100 percent agree with this fact.  Operation Smile is an organization that requires medical procedures daily to help children receive better lives.   When it comes to volunteering with organizations and my experience, it has definitely evolved over the past ten years. It is not about just volunteering my time on a weekend I have free or helping out at a soup kitchen.
I have to think about my involvement on a grander scale utilizing my education and skills to the fullest. This would mean that I would need to fundraise and educate others on the importance of this organization.

The Café Culture

Morocco is all about the cafes, especially Casablanca. Cafes are pretty much on every corner.  There are actually two on my street right in front of my apartment.  At these cafes, if you are lucky they serve Fresh juice, but most of the standard cafes(not the Posh ones) serve coffee, Moroccan tea, water, or soda.  The posh cafes will all have French menus with your same typical French menu of Café lattes, paninis, crepes, and salads. 

Who is going to these cafes?

The cafes are mostly made for the men of Casablanca.  There are many cafes that are “For men only” and women are forbidden to enter.  At these cafes, you have all kind of men from business men to old men to married men to security guards.  You have nice upscale cafes and the cafes that are filled with Moroccan futbol fans and shisha lovers. The cafe seats are all facing outward towards the streets, like Paris, and when women pass by the men just sit and stare. For me, I actually walk on the streets and avoid the sidewalks because it makes me feel uncomfortable. 
 In my book, Tahrir Shah mentioned how many of the men hang out at these cafes to escape from the “reality” of their life.  It is a place for them to break from their wife and family commitments.  It is a place that lacks responsibility and productivity.  You will just see people sit there for hours with coffee and never reading a book, writing, or doing something.  They just sit and relax.   

Being an American, this is a difficult concept for me to grasp. I understand relaxing, but sitting at a café for 2-3 hours a day just sitting around? Yes, they have phones that they talk on or use WIFI, but many cafes do not have WIFI and no smart phones.  I think this whole cafe culture is okay if you are 50 and older, but when you are younger there must be something you can be doing with your time.  For example, Mr. Casa loved the cafes. His friends and him would meet there everyday and just sit and talk and talk.  While he was employed, a few of his friends were not employed.  It seemed a bit concerning that they were so relaxed and proud of not working and sitting and chilling at a café.

 When we first met, I remember one day in the beginning we went to a café two times in the same day.  That was 3 hours from my day just sitting.  I recall feeling annoyed the second time when we went to the Moroccan mall because I would rather be walking around the mall than sitting.   For me, I can not just sit in the café when I know I should be doing other things and truly busy Moroccans can’t either.  But for some Moroccans they do not have jobs and this all they have to do to fill their time-this is sad, unfortunate, and true. 

Side Note: My one friend actually told me that some people do not finish their coffee, leave it in the café, and come back later in the day.  This is sad for people who cannot afford to buy another cup of coffee.  I wonder what another kind of reasoning could be for this. 

Anyways, Casablanca and Cafes are like two peas in a pod. Over the years and years, they have grown to love each other very much.  I understand they have love for their coffee and cafes-the coffee in Casablanca is fabulous, but as a foreigner I try to keep my coffee contact to a minimum. Cafes are a huge part of the culture and you can not avoid them completely, but you can balance them out appropriately with the rest of your hobbies and commitments.

Adoption: How Important is Race and Religion

It is fascinating the whole debate between Muslim, Christian, and Judaism. How much does religion and race play a factor in adoption?
It is important to raise the child with knowledge, understanding, and appreciation of their religion and culture.  It would be in the best interest of the child to teach and educate them on their background, but I believe in the rights of the adoptive parents. The adopting parents should have the ultimate say on how they raise their children, but when it comes to Islam-they do not want to compromise this as the Muslim identify is very important.  There is always this controversy between the religion of the child and how it should be raised when the biological parent has little or no involvement.. 

As far as race, this is another interesting principle.  When I was working as a Caseworker for New York City Foster Care(not a chosen job, but an internship for Social work school)- it was quite the eye opening experience. You do not truly know foster care until you work in it first hand- home visits, court hearings, removing children from their home on Christmas day, fighting so hard for a child named Joshua who just wanted to live with his mom, assessments of obscenely poor living conditions- it was enlightening and this is where my writing began. It inspired such a spark inside of me to seek justice for these children and make improvements in a flawed, US system. 

The one race issue, which always seems to be present in one way or another, is between African American parents and white parents.  The issue of race is actually what contributes to many children not being placed with families as many biological parents want their children raised by "their own kind"(as reported per parents I worked with).  One incident that stays glued to my mind is the final adoption of an African american baby boy being adopted by a lovely white couple.  The mother had been in recovery from drug addiction(many of my client cases) and she had been hesitant about her child being adopted by a "white couple." She expressed her concerns about how he would be dressing, what he would eat, and overall saying "it just wouldn't be the same." Last minute, she mentioned her Uncle who would be willing to take custody, which left us breaking the hearts of these lovely parents and starting over with this Uncle.  The truth is that she would rather find a random uncle she never talks to than have her child being raised by white parents. Also, in New York foster care the child will always go to a family member first before being placed with a non-relative foster family.  

This was just one case, but there were many sad realities surrounding color and race. Again, the children are the ones who suffer the consequences.  Over 60 percent of the foster families in New York foster care are African-american perhaps because whites are shunned away from the process. Children might be sent to a foster parent who has ten kids in the home, neglects the children, and uses the check for a personal shopping spree.  This is the reality that a child is removed from their parents home for neglect and they are sent into more neglect.  And when you have Sue Smith raising her hand saying, "Pick me, Pick me"- a lovely candidate for the child- they don't give Sue Smith a fair chance because she is white. 

Should race, religion,and culture have strong influence over adoption when there are limited options for these children to begin with?  The cultural and religious values are key principles that shape a child into their self and being, but are we being too critical and judgemental of letting children adopt a new set of cultural values, customs, traditions in their lives? The biological parents have a say to what extent when it is the adoptive parents who are raising the child for life? Should race and religion take priority over a child's safety and well being?

Any thoughts on adoption, race, and religion?

 

Sunday, January 27, 2013

Egypt: The Next Syria?

Two years since the revolution and Egypt is still fired up with anger, protests, rallies, and violent acts.  Being in Egypt almost 1 year ago at the time of the elections, I clearly felt the anger and hostility in the air.  When I left, Mohammed Morsi was elected and ever since then I have watched the protests in Cairo.  There is some clear hatred towards the Muslim Brotherhood and politically it seems Egypt has not established any real peace since the election.  With revolution just two years ago, Egypt is persistent and clear about what they want from government, but government is resistant and authoritative towards their needs.  When I watch, it feels like a group of bad students with a horrible traditional teacher who has no teaching strategies or knows anything about people and behavior.  The teacher just tells them, "No, you can't do this. No, you can't do that." Everything that comes out of his mouth is disrespected by the students until the teacher learns to adopt an innovative, effective, and real human approach.  The teacher is Mohammed Morsi and the students are the citizens of Egypt.  His punitive approaches are ineffective- I absolutely guarantee that Egypt's violence and anger will continue with his inefficient, punitive ways of handling the controversy.  With the state of Egypt now escalating overtime, I just wonder is going to happen next in Egypt.  Will Egypt turn into another Syria?

Syria is another country that I have just watched deteroriate for the past two years.  Each time I see it, I feel so angry about what is happening and question the intervention that is or is not occurring.  The fighting, bombing, and deaths just keep on coming year after year.  When I was in Turkey, I was researching how I could get involved with Syria, but people told me it would be too dangerous.  If someone gave me some guidance or just took me under their wing-I would have been happy to do something-any kind of involvement to help Syria.  Perhaps, it is an ideal way to think "I want to be in the center and take action" when you see crisis and war.  It is important to  realize the mentality is completely different and takes some adjustment i..e just being in Egypt I experienced some real anger, hatred, and violence and it is quite challenging to work with when people's mentality and mind are negatively influenced or driven. Perhaps this is why Mohammed Morsi is having such a difficult time or perhaps he is just an ineffective leader. 
For me, these populations and these people present as challenges anthose who are fully resistant to learn, change, or gain insight are some of my favorite cases or best accomplishments from my work. Take the challenger Morsi and don't let your people walk all over you.

What is going to happen next in Egypt? How do you feel about Syria?

Islam and Adoption

This post comes from the Moroccan News Board. It is frustrating and disappointing to read that religion trumps children's safety, security, and well being.  While I fully respect Islam, I believe their should be a consideration for the well being of the child first instead of religion.

According to the Kafala system, the child never actually becomes a "true child" of the adoptive parent i.e.the child is named after the biological parent.   This is acceptable to me, but not allowing Muslim's living America to adopt-that is unjust and unfair to children.  I understand the imporance of raising a child with Muslim religion, especially in a more conservative country like Morocco, but Islamists are just shutting out Americans all together if they will not even let foreign Muslims adopt. 
  
Today, Morocco has some of the most alarming statistics of orphans and instead of decreasing that statistic-they choose to let it increase and take away good, loving parents from deserving children. When left in orphanages and on the streets, children turn to streets crimes and suicide.  These children are not getting a fair chance at life and are missing opportunites with good families. 
They have good parents willing to adopt and they take this "religious" position to respect Islam.  Is this what Islam is about? Putting children on the streets and their lives in jeopardy for their higher power?  Orphanage and political activists need to keep working to change this law, but it the people vs. Islam. 




Morocco: Adoption Of Orphans Under Attack By Islamist Government
Boys in a Moroccan orphanage


Regarding a growing unease over moves by current islamist Justice Minister Mr. Ramid efforts to restrict adoption in Morocco, at a time when the situation of orphaned or abandoned children is critical. A recent circular from the Ministry of Justice dismissing the right of non-resident foreigners to adopt has led to grave concerns about the future welfare of Moroccan orphans.
The latest protests come from a group of six children's welfare associations. Their concerns join those of couples currently in the process of adopting.

Unfortunately Morocco has not kept pace with international standards when it comes to adoption and still adheres to what many see as an outdated system known as kafala. Islamic views on adoption are generally distinct from practices and customs of adoption in other non-Muslim parts of the world like Western or East Asian societies. Raising a child who is not one's genetic child is allowed and, in the case of an orphan, even encouraged. But, according to the Islamic view, the child does not become a "true" child of the adoptive parents. For example, the child is named after the biological, not adoptive, father. More conservative Muslims go so far as to claim that adoption is forbidden by Islamic law but that it is permissible to take care of the child in a fostering arrangement. In Arabic this is known as kafala.

The intent of kafala is to ensure that a child is raised as a Muslim. But, because monitoring kafala can not be assured abroad, the Ministry fears that the adopted child will not be educated in the teachings of Islam.

On September 19, a circular (No.40 S/2) issued by the Ministry of Justice and Freedoms was a bombshell, saying that after investigation kafala should be refused "to foreigners who are not ordinarily resident in Morocco." And therefore it "is granted only to applicants who reside permanently in the country."

The argument developed by the Ministry is based on the fact that judge responsible for granting or denying kafala has an investigative role to determine "moral fitness and social ability to raise an abandoned child in the the precepts of Islam". In the case of adoptive parents living outside Morocco this is impossible. Article 9 of the Law on kafala requires the supervising judge to ensure that all the terms of any agreement continue to be met. Failure to do so gives the judge power to revoke the kafala. In practice this is never done, but is all the justification needed to deny kafala to foreign couples. What all this ignores is the welfare of the child.

The six Moroccan associations fighting for the right of abandoned children to have parents were alarmed by the September 19th circular and took the case to the Courts of Appeal and Courts of First Instance.

The decision to exclude foreigners to kafala, even if they are Muslims (who do not live Morocco) has caused great concern and confusion within the associations working to better the lives of abandoned or orphaned children. The associations in the frontline of this fight for the children are Village Children, The Babies Association of Morocco, The Rita Foundation, The Zniber Association, Dar Al Wafa Atfal, The Osraty Association and the Association of Children's Friends. These associations are gaining strong support for a public a petition against the Ministry's decision. They have also questioned what, if any, alternative measures the Ministry will come up with "to protect the best interests of the child as defined by national and international law."

As it currently stands, the Ministry circular has effectively deprived thousands of children the opportunity of adoption and a better life. The children will continue to live in orphanages with often substandard conditions and the risk of institutionalisation. According to the welfare associations the damage to the children is significant and, " 80% of children who remain in orphanages become offenders and 10% commit suicide." The associations go on to say, "This circular will aggravate the situation for the centres who are even now unable to receive more children and child trafficking networks of all kinds will not miss this opportunity."

It is difficult to understand how the Ministry intends to rectify the situation that will develop from the kafala ban. According to estimates, 24 babies are abandoned every day in Morocco. With an annual rate of 6000 abandoned children, the capacity of the orphanages has been far exceeded. The numbers of Moroccan families and foreigners resident in the country cannot absorb the number of children. According to Asmaa Benslimane, founding president of the association Babies Morocco, the rate "national kafala is practically equal to the international kafala (50%)."

The effects of the ban, according to the authors of the petition, will be "dramatic" as the numbers soar of infants and children without parents who are unable to be adopted. The statistics confirm their case. Public awareness of abandoned children has gained momentum in recent years and rather than banning adoptions, Morocco needs to encourage suitable applicants, whether they live in Morocco or abroad. According to the national survey conducted in 2010 by INSAF, 27, 200 single mothers gave birth in the previous year out of wedlock. According to the same study, 153 babies are born out of wedlock every day, and 24 of them are abandoned.

An earlier study, conducted in 2009 by the Moroccan League for Child Welfare and UNICEF , revealed that the number of abandoned children was 4,554, (in 2008), representing 1.3% of total births in that year. These children, some of whom are lucky enough to be accommodated in nursing homes and other care centers for children, "have the right to parental affection," said the Child Welfare League.

A major concern for the associations is the question: why does this circular prohibit kalfala to couples not resident in Morocco, knowing that 50% of adopting parents are foreigners, and that the ministry was aware of this?

The answer to this first question comes from the circular itself: "Monitoring of judicial practice indicates that these provisions (those provided by the Kafala Act) are not executed efficiently and correctly, to reflect the legislator's intentions which are to find the appropriate framework for the protection of the abandoned child, and that education takes place in a climate that prepares a child's future, so that it plays its role in society."

Latifa Taoufik, a judge and assistant general secretary in the Ministry of Justice, is reassuring. She said that the circular came "in response to reports that the Department has received, and that state that there are adoptive parents who exploit and abuse children adopted abroad without any control." Since the procedure is applied incorrectly, Taoufik says, the department "wanted to tighten up the procedure, until bilateral agreements are signed on the issue with countries where kafala is applied."

And what of the foreign applicants who have already started the process? Their fate is still uncertain. For example, the Lalla Hasna orphanage in Casablanca, opened in 1956 making it one of the oldest in Morocco, has are no fewer than 22 pending applications from foreigners not resident in Morocco.
"The couples are varied, with mixed marriages, foreigners converted to Islam and Muslims by birth. They come from France, Canada, Dubai, United States," said Samira Kaouachi, director of the orphanage. She added that these foreign Muslims often choose children with physical or mental conditions, that Moroccans would never accept.

She concludes that "It is not normal that the 22 pending cases are not resolved, the future parents are determined and they feel a sense of frustration at not being able to complete their process. Let's get these files first." She says it is unacceptable that these children are "stored" in an institution and face an uncertain future.

Another problem complicating things in the Casablanca children's home is that from late 2011 to October 2012, the orphanage has recorded four returns of adopted children, and two more are in progress. "In all cases, the adoptive parents are Muslim Moroccans living in Morocco, who have decided these children are defective products, simply because they are nervous, restless or whatever. Is this Islam?" asks the forthright Ms Kaouachi.

From 1990 to October 2009, the Lalla Hasna orphanage welcomed 2,447 children and 1,389 of these benefited from kafala adoptions. Between 2010 and October 2012, it hosted 300 children. 244 of these were adopted - 50 to non-resident foreigners in Morocco. Currently, another 22 are awaiting adoption by foreigners. Of these, 18 suffer from a physical or mental disability. Boys are in the overwhelming majority, because the orphanage receives almost no girls. "Girls do not come here unless they are sick or disabled," said Samira Kaouachi, psychologist and director of the orphanage. This is explained by the fact that, "mothers rarely leave the girls, they are more docile than boys and their education is relatively easier. We receive only girls whose mothers are in prison, needing psychiatric treatment or girls with disabilities".

The orphanage receives abandoned children whose parents are unknown, and advises couples wishing to adopt a child. "Even if (the adoptive parents) they have good conditions, they feel the lack of a child. The balance, training and affection are only possible in a home between loving parents, even if they are adopted. 70% of these children are cared for every year through kafala, and we would have liked it to be more. We would like our orphanage to be seen as reception center, " laments Samira Kaouachi.

The Hague Convention

The best solution to Morocco's adoption problems would be to sign the the Hague Convention on Protection of Children and Co-operation in Respect of Intercountry Adoption (or Hague Adoption Convention). However, the problem arises that the convention and Islamic law have fundamental conflicts that need to be overcome.

It is an international convention dealing with international adoption, child laundering, and child trafficking. It was concluded on 29 May 1993 and entered into force on 1 May 1995.

Recognising some of the difficulties and challenges associated with international adoption, and in an effort to protect those involved from the corruption and exploitation which sometimes accompanies it, the Hague Conference on Private International Law developed the Convention.

The main objectives of the Convention are:

To establish safeguards to ensure that intercountry adoptions take place in the best interests of the child and with respect for his or her fundamental rights as recognized in international law;

To establish a system of co-operation amongst Contracting States to ensure that those safeguards are respected and thereby prevent the abduction, the sale of, or traffic in children;
to secure the recognition in Contracting States of adoptions made in accordance with the Convention.

As of April 2012, this Convention has been ratified by 89 countries. Haiti, Nepal and The Russian Federation are signatories, but have not ratified.

The convention states:
"Intercountry adoptions shall be made in the best interests of the child and with respect for his or her fundamental rights

Russia, the US, and Adoption

Another country to not let Americans adopt their children: Russia.  The Prime Minster reports that there were many cases of abuse, torture, and death with adoptions by American parents.  He said, "Just one death" can be enough to ban the adoption from Americans.

Over 20 years, of course there is going to be some adoption problems of mistreatment, neglect, etc. According to statistics from CNN, 20 years and 19 deaths out of 60,000 children adopted.
In most countries, the process of becoming a foster parent is an extensive one and this applies for US candidates as well.   These parents and families background and life details are given generally finding good, loving, desirable candidates for these children.
Of course, everything is not sunshine and rainbows with adoption. There are those families adopting for the wrong reason, neglecting, or abusing children.   It is not great that there were 19 deaths, but the 19 deaths are not really what is stopping American from adopting: it is the politics. 
In most countries, the process of becoming a foster parent is a long, detailed one.    America creates a law punishing human rights abuses in Russia and Russia bans their adoption of their children.
It is unfortunate, disappointing, frustrating, and outrageous that children are involved with these politics and they serve the punishment. 
Putin and the prime minister say that the "there are plenty of well to do Russians who can step up and take care of the children." Are you serious? What kind of response is that when you have an orphan crisis over in Russia and these kids will most likely be sent back to the streets and into unsafe conditions?
If I flip a coin to the other side and understand they have the right to make this decision.  Americans can adopts their own children through domestic adoption.  At least, let the final children be adopted and then pass this law.There were 50 children in the middle of finalizing their adoption, parents who bought plane tickets to pick up their new "son" or "daughter", designed rooms for them, and many met their child already. They invested their time, money, and hearts into the process. Let these parents have these children and then pass the law. 

How can these political leaders be so naive and careless to the well being of children? It just goes to show the power of politics and leaves children to reap the negative benefits. 
Also, it has been mentioned and I have heard before that Americans just want Russian babies so they can claim it is their own. Perhaps, this is a factor in a parents decision, but a parent is dedicated to this child for their life.  Their world revolves around this child and they are many couples are thankful to have a child.  Americans even adopt special needs children, which are infrequently adopted in Russia. 

Fortunately, there are senior officials in Russia who disagree with this decision and maybe something will change in the near future.  If not, it is just another country with more orphans and less loving parents to adopt them-such a shame. 

Saturday, January 26, 2013

Leo The Lion

From a very young age, I would read my horoscope and tune into the many similarities.  It was always amazing to me how identical I could be to my actual astrological sign. For some people, this is something "you choose to believe" or it is just made up.  This is definitely not the case as I believe there is a true universal connection going on between Priscilla and the, sun, moon, and stars. It is incredible how much my horoscope is similar to my actual plans, goals, thoughts, personality, and character. There is a true universal connection going on between Priscilla and the universe.

My horoscope for 2013 is right on target with what I believe, desire, want, my strengths, and weaknesses. Priscilla is a Leo for Life!


leo



Overview

Get ready to dig deeply in 2013, Leo. You're going into a phase of complete and total metamorphosis. This will require considerable self-analysis and probing into your past patterns, but all the work will be more than worth it. You're on the verge of discovering just how powerful, strong and resilient you are at your very core. If you have ever doubted your strength, after 2013 you'll never question your resourcefulness again. Saturn, the great karmic lord of trials and tribulations, will be camping out at the base of your horoscope until 2015, so you'll have plenty of time to delve into the depths. Family issues and psychological patterns inherited from your parents will come to the surface this year, making your more aware of -- and able to avoid -- negative patterns. Wake up, Leo! Get ready for a major rebirth.
 
Lucky Jupiter will continue to bring good fortune to your social sector and help you dream big until June. You've been so blessed with the amazing people you've met over the past year who have helped you reach your goals. The second half of the year, you may want to pull back when Jupiter enters your retreat zone. This is a time of dreaming and scheming before launching into the next chapter of your life in 2014. So the first half of the year will continue to be incredibly social, but give yourself permission to come back to a more internal and creative space during the latter part of 2013.

The eclipse patterns of 2013 will shake up both home and career sectors, so get ready for rapid advance and decline in both arenas. Don't get too attached to any of the gains or losses in either of these life departments, as they will constantly be in flux until you reach a healthy middle ground -- and you will!

Romantic

2013 gives you a strong desire to plant roots. Your heart is looking for the kind of partnership that can endure the long haul. The search and restlessness is finally over, Leo. You know where you want to be and you're ready to anchor yourself long enough to establish a solid routine. Saturn will occupy your domestic sector until 2015, encouraging you to stick to your guns in love. If you're single, you'll be thinking about settling down and possibly even getting married and having a family. If you're already in a long-term relationship, you'll be looking to deepen the foundation and work towards greater levels of passion and intimacy. Your days of being on the prowl for the sake of the thrill are over. You want everlasting love.
 
Career- Save the Best For Last

You continue to build and destroy -- and then build some more -- in your efforts to properly carve out your throne in 2013. Pluto and Uranus will continue their explosive breakthrough dance to release you from any stagnant areas that have kept you locked in dead-end positions. You're ready to take a well-calculated risk in order to assure you're living up to your full potential. Your loyalty and hard work continue to be rewarded with accolades and recognition. You have remained in the shadows long enough. As humbling as the past few years have been, you're ready to shine with full Leo radiance.

A strong and emotionally stable home life is what will support your professional aims this year, Leo. With Saturn taking up residence in your domestic sector until 2015, you're learning the importance of cultivating a serious backbone that serves you in presenting a fierce and magentic public image. You're able to tap into unparalleled resourcefulness now. You're very clear about what you have to offer, and how it is one-of-a-kind and highly valuable. No longer will you doubt your strength or sell yourself short in your work.

Pluto continues to teach you mind-blowing lessons on how to use-or-lose your power when it comes to your career. You can be generous to a fault, and have a tendency to give it all away when you need to keep some for yourself. Only recently are you starting to see how this undermines your power and depletes your resources. It's one thing to give but another to know when to hold something back and allow others to come to you. This is a painful but invalubale lesson. 2013 is your year to receive
,
Leo!

"I'm Busy"


You work hard to make money, but then by the time you make it your friends are gone because you never kept in touch with them and you were always too busy. What kind of life is this? Working  a lot okay, but since when did it become okay to just forget about our friends with the “I’m busy” excuse. It is not enough to justify not calling and staying in contact with someone you care about.

Often when I email people I hear, “ I never hear from you, Wow” or the famous, "Sorry I have been busy." It takes two to tango of course, but both parties should be in touch someway or somehow instead of just months of no contact. As human beings, do we really get that "busy" that we can not respond to an email when we have an iphone?" What is the IPHONE for if people do not use it keep in touch. I realize many people do use its features to keep in touch and that is great. It just seems that we rely on facebook to keep us in touch with people and this is a negative way to communicate, especially if a person does not want to use facebook.
It was scary when years and years passed by on facebook and I realized how much time I invested into it. It was just sad that all that time could have went into a started business(literal truth). It is very sad=( Oh well lesson learned right?

As we get older, we need to focus on what is important to us and what holds value in our hearts, minds, and lives…PRIS

The work will always be there, but our friends and family may not…PRIS

Writing and Regret

I try not to live with many regrets as I believe everything is a learning experience, but sometimes we do have real regret. My regret is revolved around writing-not writing enough.  If I could have went back and wrote on all my trips, my life in Los Angeles, and especially more writing in New York. I was often writing thoughts, theories, and ideas on notepads. New York is the city that stimulated my mind. It is no wonder such great writers come out of New York-the city and your experiences just stick with you.  I really could have had a solid book by now or possible two.  The should haves of the past are over and I have to work from the present day forward. 
Currently, a specific writing regret is catching up to me- not taking a Grant Writing course in Social Work school. I always knew it would be useful, but I avoided it because I focused on classes that peaked my interest more. 

If you think about it, Grant writing is one of the most important parts of social work. For years and years, I have been focused on the face to face therapeutic aspect with clients and paid little attention to funding.  Living in Morocco and travelling through Asia, I see that the funding is what keeps organizations going.  This statement is not saying that money is the only important thing for an organization, but money is the realistic component.  For example, Operation Smile has procedures performed day in and day out and these procedures cost a lot of money.

After speaking with the Directors of a few large organizations in Casablanca, I realize the need for funding is a big one, which is why I am going to try to teach myself Grant writing or find some experienced grant writers who can help me.  This will make me feel like I am doing something good on the larger scale of things while staying involved directly with NGOS. It is the best of both worlds: direct interaction and indirect-fundraising. 

Coffee Shops and Reading

My one coffee shop that I am always in(aka my part time office)I like to observe what is going on around me.  What I observe is 90 percent of people with a blackberry, Iphone, and computer, but hardly anyone reading the newspaper reading a book.   

What happened to sitting at a coffeeshop and reading a nice book or the newspaper without a technological device going off on the table? Yes, people could be reading on their computers and I know people are working and being productive. I just feel concerned that I do not see enough Moroccans reading.  Reading is important at any age and for any culture. When I enter this coffee shop and do my daily observations, I am so happy when I come across someone reading a book. I try to make eye contact and give them a big smile.

This post is not to say that Moroccans do not read, but I do observe that Moroccans do read less than other cultures. This post is to bring attention to the problem with technology.  It is distracting us away from books.  Five to ten years ago at the coffee shops, you might have seen double the amount of people with books. People are so consumed with their email, iphones, whatsap, instagram, twitter, and facebook rather than just bringing a plain old book to the coffee shop.

Come on Casa please spend time reading- Priscilla has faith and believes in your interests, talents, gifts, and abilities. 

ADIDAS-All Day I Dream About Shopping

                    

Many times throughout the week, I just sit and dream about shopping. Usually, this happens after I buy a pair of stockings that have a hole the next day, a pair of shoes with the emblem falling off, or a blanket with missing threads.

I sit and think, “Just a few days-Oh the beauty of just a few days in the US to shop.”

This was previously discussed, but the shopping in the US is an absolute luxury when you are spending your time in countries like India, Turkey, and Morocco. These countries have beautiful traditional gowns, antiques, lamps, mirrors, rugs, religious clothing, etc., but when it comes to real shopping-they are drowning in cheaply made stuff.

The decent stores that they have are Zara, Mango, and Bershka, but this does not offer the wide range of quality and brands I am accustomed to.  I miss BCBG, DKNY, Guess, Michael Kors, Rachel Roy, the sales from Macys, Loehmanns, Nordstroms, and Bloomingdales.  I knew the sales were amazing, but I never knew how amazing until I went abroad. The quality of clothing you get for the price can never be beat-maybe in Europe of course like Spain and London are suppose to be good. I have just become accustomed to quality from a very young age.  I can not just buy poor quality stuff just to buy it. It is black and white where I would rather walk around wearing the same thing than buy cheap, poorly made clothing, shoes, or purses.  The Moroccans I do know shop in the US if or when they go or they cross over to Spain, Paris, or Italy to do their shopping and I completely understand why. 

For the time being, I just buy basics and what I need from Mango and Bershka until I can make a trip to Spain or maybe even the US where I can do some real shopping-one day, but until then I will just keep dreaming!

How I LOVE Thee Buddha Bar

Words cannot describe how much I love Buddha bar-it is one of the most relaxing ways I spend my time- writing and Buddha bar- it is such a beautiful experience.  Buddha Bar combines various asian and middle eastern sounds.

Actually, Buddha Bar was playing in the Taj Mahal Marrakech, but the price was 3500DH, which was something I was willing to pay, but I can not expect my friend to pay for my extravagant tastes.   That would have been incredible to see Buddha Bar Live on New Years Eve-wowwww next time.
 
 

Stay Inside Futbol Maniacs on the Loose

For some stupid reason, they decided to put the futbol stadium in the main city centre of Casablanca. Usually, stadiums are built on the outskirts of cities for reasons that I’m sure may or may not be proved through research. 

With a stadium com
es crowds, increases in traffic, increases in crime and violence, etc. Therefore, building a stadium in the middle of a busy city centre, which already has enough traffic, crime, and craziness is not the brightest idea. If I can side with the stadium creators-perhaps they did not know how big and booming Casablanca would become as they built it over 20 years ago.

When there is a futbol game on, it is absolute obssession.  It feels like the whole country stops.  Men sit at cafes with their eyes glued to the TV.  If someone has a plan with you, they most likely will cancel it to watch the futbol game.  There is complete madness on the streets. They shout, chant, come up to the car, bang on the windows, shout, scream, throw objects in the air, and waive the flag. I have experienced it first hand and thought it was fun, but now I realize it not safe to be outside when there is a futbol game-way too much testosterone going through the air.  My friend said to me "Some of the best advice I can give you is to stay inside when there is a futbol game." I agree wit her that woman jeopordize their safety walking outside during these times as young boys(I like to call them Moroccan punks) will tease you, bother you, and get in your face- it is not a nice experience.
Watch the futbol game at home and stay indoors!